Jugnu's Diary

Jugnu's Diary

Open diary

Bitter sweet

22 years old, Female, India

Diary Entries (243)

Dec 31th, 2017 10:31 PM

Hi Jugnu!

I am here to write the year updates. Writing daily updates has now changed to writing year updates. Strange, isn't it?

2017 has been quite good to me. A lot of things happened this year.
My journey to new city started on Jan 8. I was too excited because finally, I was going to be independent. I had heard how difficult the training at Bhubaneshwar would be and I was scared. I wanted to focus and do my best, and I was determined to make it up for all the things that I thought I would in 4 years and did not. These three months were the best. I learned, fell, got up, found love and found freedom. I met with some good people and understood how IT works.
I flew back to Bangalore in April and the month was full of ups and downs.He managed to pull me up. We both love food and we explored popular areas and popular food outlets in Bangalore.

I had been to Pondicherry in June, and it was the most memorable trip. It is on this trip that I realized what means the most to me. I visited a Church there and prayed. I am not a religious person but, I will go to the place again if everything works fine.

August was my birthday month. I got a lot of gifts and most importantly someone special made it worth remembering. Dada, Ananta, Shashank and I had been out for dinner, and dada had sketched my portrait. That was a nice gesture.
I met with Ayushi and Nidhi among my writer friends, and I am waiting to meet ditto. It feels so good that we are all in the same city.
In September I had been on a trip to Wayanad, and the place is heaven on earth.
The year was full of outings, new friends, get-togethers, parties, reunions, trekking, food, career and keeping me happy.

Now I have set new goals, and I have decided to shop less this year. I will work harder in Jan and Feb at the office. I will prepare well for the exam and leave this place by the end of next year. It requires a lot of hard work, and I will put in the efforts to achieve what I want to. I see a lot of struggle coming my way, especially in March because we will be telling at his home about us and then mine. We want to make this work, and we will leave no stone unturned because now my happiness lies in being with him. My soul likes the way he treats me. He will leave for Germany next year. I want to walk with him and watch him as he succeeds.

Also, I want to travel to Coorg, Chikmagalur, and Rajasthan in the coming year

Dec 11th, 2016 10:24 PM

Guy from Australia.
His only sister settled in the USA.
His parents are in Pune.

He is a perfect match in terms of property, culture and everything.
See if you want to consider and get married.

What do you think i did jugnu?

I choose my career in making over a successful guy.

To be independent is more important to me.

Good night.

Dec 06th, 2016 8:56 PM

Hey!

I read my last entry and i was wondering why i was not fine?:D
Lol it happens sometimes. You are not fine for no reason.

I had prepared paneer biriyani today and it was finger licking good.

All is well. Badmi had come home on Saturday and we had great time.
Everyone around me is noticing that i have started talking less.
Well! i have become an observer and a listener now.


okay now, bye :)

Nov 22th, 2016 00:06 AM

Hi!

You guessed it right, i am not feeling great after many days today.

Listen, it's always okay to give all you have and to expect nothing in return. But wait! Expecting nothing in return is not very easy. We don't always intend to expect you see. Sometimes, you expect little things. Like you want to mean something to the person who means the world to you. When you share your thoughts, your life and every happy moment with someone, a part of you wants to know more about that person, a part of you that cares beyond limits wants to be cared and loved in turn.

Why am i deviating?
Because i don't want to talk about what is worrying me. You know me right? I dislike sharing pain and may be that's why i am here.


Anyway, good night :)

Nov 06th, 2016 01:18 AM

Hi Jugnu!
Well kaustu reminded me of you. Otherwise you know it has been long since i last talked with you.

My life is going great. I can't ask for more.

Well i should tell you about another strange incident that happened day before yesterday.
My friends and i meet up at a coffee bar almost every evening. The same happened day before yesterday but only Gouri and i had been there. We ordered the same drink that we usually do. It has caramel and you know right? I can drink caramel instead of water :p Well! We also ordered sandwiches and in an hour we left that place. The moment i reached back home, i started feeling very drowsy. I slept off on the bedroom floor. Mom was shocked. I was behaving weirdly. I got up after 10 minutes and i felt very high. I wasn't able to have a control on my behavior. I thought something was wrong with me. After sometime Gouri called up and asked if i was feeling drowsy and high too. It was now obvious, that someone had mixed something in our drink.
My mom asked me for so many times, if something was wrong. I dint tell anything at home.
I was supposed to go and complain the next at the coffee bar but i dint find time. But this was unexpected. We are sure it was done on purpose.

Chalo going to sleep now.
It was nice talking to you jugnu.

Good night.

Oct 12th, 2016 9:44 PM

Jugnu pack your bags :p

We are going .
Yippppiiee.
Waiting for this week to end.

Oct 11th, 2016 00:20 AM

People come. People leave. People change.

I just need to accept it and i am sure i will be happier than ever if i do.

Oct 07th, 2016 10:41 PM

Dandiya for 3 hours.
I wish i dint have to come back :D

Oct 04th, 2016 4:44 PM

The same rain but, different feelings. The same sound but different thoughts. It's just the matter of time and everything changes. Your thoughts, your priorities and the way you see little things in life.

The thunderstorm calls you loud, the heavy droplets of rain want to drench you in mediocrity and suddenly you say
"Darling!! you have enormous power,what are you worrying about? You have survived the sun and you will survive this as well. You were not born to be like any other because you have strength to throw yourself off a cliff and still survive. Not many can do that. If you did, it only means you are not born just to be like any other. You are unstoppable if only you learn how to channelize all the power you have in one fixed direction. You have wasted it on things that don't yield anything and that's why, you do not have anything."

For now, self motivation has no definite time because it is all over you.

Oct 3rd, 2016 10:25 PM

Entering into 20's

I feel the changes already. Life is so different when you get out of college. Your mistakes are no more forgiven, you are included in all major family decisions and since you make valid points most decisions are according to your will. You can't be ignorant. You have responsibilities and the journey towards being independent starts now for many people of my age.

If you want comforts,you have to earn for yourself.

The race doesn't end at all. You feel lost because you now are a part of big organisations where lakhs of people like you work. Competition is never ending and for people like me with big aims, little is never enough. To reach big, you need to start small. Many of your friends would have started big already and you are only anxious thinking about where you want to reach and how long is it gonna take. There's pressure building up because little is never enough for you.

I will succeed, not immediately but definitely :)

ciao.

Oct 2nd, 2016 01:46 AM

Tears trickled down her cheek. Why wouldn't they?
Everything she liked was now out of stock and what could be more painful. :p

#confession of a shopaholic.

All the neckpieces and set of finger rings i had chosen went out of stock.

A pair of new white sneakers.
3 new shades of matte lipsticks from NYX.
An olive green jumpsuit from f21.
A pair of wedges with fringes and a pair of tie up flats.
A pair of heeled boots from inch5.
A bodycon dress and an A line dress.
An ombre top.
A boyfriend jeans.
A denim shirt from Levi's.
A black cropped trouser from MandS.

Okay. These are still on the list and should choose. Such a hectic schedule you see :D

I should see you off now. Tada


Sep 30th, 2016 10:19 PM

Hi Jugnu

How's you doing?
I have had a great day just like any other :p I don't know how many new people i am talking with and i am losing the count. I have been blessed with the most amazing people in the world and i can't thank god enough for that. They tolerate the absolutely crazy me and they are all just a call away. I can talk to them about anything and everything in the world and they will never get bored. Ah!! may be that is why i don't find a need to express myself here because i have living creatures who i can laugh and be happy with and i have a shoulder to cry upon every time when i feel weak.

I can watch M.S.DHONI everyday and i am sure i will not get bored because these are the kind of movies i love watching. The kind of movies that give goosebumps and add fuel to the fire that burns within day and night. Respect to this man. By the way how can i miss writing about Sushant Singh Rajput. Damn!! his smile is worth drooling over. He looks so handsome.

It has been raining since 15 days and all i miss right now are those long drives and sudden road trips. We used to travel to Amboli ghat just to eat maggie. Well!! when everyone else smoked i often sat there watching the changing shades of the sky. Loud music, my absolute stupidity and you know what was the best part? Guy friends :) I could be irresponsible and it felt way to safe so i did tease quite a few guys back when they teased me because i knew there was someone to handle the consequences. Trust me when i tell this, Goa is heaven. Yes of course i hate the sun but mornings and nights are wooowwwww. It had become our second home and i miss Goa more than anything. Those narrow streets flooded with foreigners who are relaxed forever,the smell of the sea, those places with great ambience, those calm beaches, the beautiful sunset, the frequently kissing waves, the water sports and the perfect kind of friends. Damn!! i miss those people and i can't explain how much.

I met Rishabh also today. I have become this shopping friend to many people and they drag me along to choose for them. He has remained the same very innocent guy that he was back in school.

Chalo goodnight.

There is no midnight writing today because nothing flashed across my mind and instead i thought i will i write about what i miss the most.




Sep 29th, 2016 11:59 PM

Also jugnu
I am really worried about bhai now. I did not hear from him and this hasn't happened before. During this time, i just realized he is really really important to me and he means a lot. After all, there aren't too many people i keep worrying about right? He makes me overcome my habit of staying detached. Yeah right!! How can somebody not be attached to a guy like him.
Anyway, i hope he is doing good and i hope everything is fine like wine.

Tada

Sep 29th, 2016 11:40 PM

She waited for the memories to fade.
But they were only replaced by more beautiful ones.

#midnight writing

How i struggle to write just 2 sentences. :p

Well days are going good. Life's great :)

Ciao jugnu.

Sep 29th, 2016 00:14 AM

She saw his message and smiled. In less than a minute, she replied.

He saw her message and swiped. In less than 2 days he replied.

He was her first priority and she was his last.

#midnight writing :p

Sep 27th, 2016 09:43 AM

oh how i started reading about religion so early in the morning. So many religions and so many views.
Where do i belong?
I don't know, may be no where. Most of the times, religion, place and country are some topics i don't like talking about. I hadn't been to temple for years. I am not an atheist but i am also not a fanatic.
I live by the rules that makes sense to me and these rules can change only for better and only if there are enough scientific reasons that can convince my way of thinking.
I might belong to earth but i feel less like a human and more like an alien :p

Sep 27th, 2016 07:23 AM

My best friend is me,
But sometimes, i too feel lonely.

Every time i fell apart, i would pick myself up but, picking every bit of the broken me would be so much better if there was someone who told and believed i could do it all.

My best friend is me,
but sometimes, i too feel lonely.

I am insane and i act crazy and all happy. But it would be so much better if there was someone i could go crazy with, the one who knows my sanity lies in insanity.

My best friend is me,
but sometimes, i too feel lonely.

During the time of the month, when i cannot understand myself, i too feel lonely. I wish there was someone who pampered, and someone who thought it's okay not to be okay sometimes.

My best friend is me,
but sometimes, i too feel lonely.

Sometimes it feels the best to take care of another person instead of myself. Sometimes, 'writing our story' feels so much better than 'writing my story'.

My best friend is me,
but sometimes, i too feel lonely.

Sep 25th, 2016 10:29 PM

Don't believe the happy faces of people in those pretty pictures, it's just the camera that makes them smile most of the times.

Sep 24th, 2016 00:59 AM

Talking to you is like reading a book. The kind of book i would never want to stop reading 💛

#random lines

Sep 22th, 2016 4:48 PM

I don't want to be the kind of women who falls into a pit and waits for rescue. I want to be the one who has learnt how to be there for herself, how to stand on her own and live on her own.
No i don't want to be a women who thinks she is a little less just because she is a woman. I want to be that carefree, independent women who can be her own hero.

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