Sometimes I wonder how people enter into your life so randomly and become so special to you in a moment! And sometimes those whom you think are meant for you, surprise you by turning into a complete stranger!
I have experienced both the situations and I can tell how amazing it feels to find someone who has the access to same ideas as yours; and equally grieving is the moment when those you love tell you that you are nothing!
Suffering through the later, I ended up finding the former. Now, this was the moment that made me realize what I Actually was and what I Am supposed to be. I found someone whom I have been finding since long, but never could until I started losing myself!
Getting tired of crying for several months and disturbing friends for soothing myself, I googled for “online counselling” and here I found the site “7 Cups”. I registered myself as a member first and chose a listener to whom I could repeat my story. Trying it for three days, but finding myself on the same stage of emotions, I passed the test for becoming a listener and registered myself as one. I did this because now I did not want to lessen my pain, I just wanted to forget it by listening to others. I did not want to think about myself. I thought it might help me gaining the pain of others that none of my own may feel anymore.
IT was my first day as a 7 Cups Listener, and here is when I found the one whom I have always wanted but never had. A person who could just talk beyond “people” , “religion” or “status”, who could value sharing of ideas, who could know the importance of innovation and creativity and who was ready to discuss on “ideas”. O yes, he was not an alien, of course he was and is a human being therefore he, like me, ended up on that site. Important to mention is he was not a usual person, or a fake gaining attention for the sake of chat; because I am a writer and I could tell there was something about him that was speaking volumes for his genuineness. So, instead to switching to any other chat I kept my focus on that stranger because all I knew was that he needed an honest ear to be listened. Yes he had the problems just like any other human being, but the way he elaborated on his ideas hide all his weaknesses!
Not only he was gifted with the knowledge beyond my access, I found him quite attractive when I saw him. Whatever he had been writing and sharing until then, I could see all in his eyes! Yes, I admit he had these attractive green eyes which were absorbing all his pain as much as possible, and yet reflecting the intelligence of him as brightly as possible! The rest of the face showed nothing but innocence of a 23 years old who had much more to focus on in his life than just being charming which he already was! I won’t deny the affection for beauty, but it’s not what only matters to me! Because I was talking to him long before even when I saw him. It’s humanity that matters! And amazingly, this person who claims to have met the devils was an angel in himself. I don’t know what wrongs he might have done in his life, but he was the one who has finally had something to help me being myself, who had interest in discussing Quantum Physics rather than just goofing around for a time pass chat with a girl, an atheist who had an open mind ready to listen to my Islamic stories, who would suggest me a movie of Time and Space rather than “Mission Impossible” or “The Notebook”, a reader who would read blogs/reviews and actually point out the exact sentence that values most in it, a character who seems to be speaking from a novel to me, a crazy who wants to build an army of people like him, and a boy who seemed just like another me in mind.
I am not saying this is ultimate love, because that is highly misunderstood in today’s world! I would rather say it as a need for one person for another who have something so much common in thoughts that there is a need of exploring those ideas and sharing the knowledge just for the sake of knowledge!