6th May 2012

Its exactly 12:03 AM on my watch. I am sitting in front of the laptop, not so blank, having two internal papers tomorrow, of which I care the least about. I will have to scribble some signal flow diagrams and canonical block diagrams into the hiked blue books tomorrow for hours in order to avoid the red pen striking off my parent’s expectations. Do not misunderstand. My mind is not haunted with exam. I have not even started studying yet and have set up alarms of 5, 5:15, 5:30, 5:45 to help me wake me up and study.

I am not even thinking about future, but I am thinking about past. Nostalgia is seeping through me at this point of time. I am a person who believes in moving forward. But being into one of the most happening college of Bangalore, MS Ramaiah Institute of Technology, in between the ‘fast fooding and moving life’, with ‘low thinking, high held heads’, you are bound to enjoy (and sarcasm drips down my words). I don’t like my college much apart from the freedom it provides in terms of stay in the college. Every other person I greet in the college, carries the face I don’t want to see ever. The fake smile spreading over the lips and ‘you are an asshole’ expression in eyes of each person makes me realise, this is the supposed college life? I do have made friends here (that somehow reached plurality). Haven’t been for them, I would have been clearing off clusters of worms from my bony skull in the corner of some graveyard (I would have been dead by now).

Cutting short, I miss my school, my friends and also people of school to whom I never ever talked to. There was a time, when going to school to study (whatever) was something I looked forward to. Getting up every morning at 5.45, freshening up, changing to the schoolboy look, and carrying a bag to the school is something I miss. Before the break, all the lunch boxes were empty as compared to having mini f***** meal in the college canteen now. Free periods did not mean checking out the chicks in the famous food court, but a run around in the corridors and games in the class. Punishment meant kneeling down in front of the staffroom, rather than being detained.

I miss the football matches in the muddy school ground in white P.T shoes and the matches in the mecon stadium and the sail ground, in school dress after the half day in school. I miss the Activity period. I miss the bald USELESS and MEANINGLESS chanda, the lollipop faced POPA, the half giant body and giant hearted sir, the ‘its IORTA not i’ sir and everyone else. I miss “my heartiest congratulations” speeches in the assembly. I miss the importance of teachers’ day and children’s day. Memories of water fights, chalk fights and the girls versus boys team with innocence brings a smile on face. Capturing the last seat and then singing aloud ‘sutta’ in the bus with mad friends and bull fights of bus presses on the memories. I miss the games and fun we had during FIItjee classes(yeah games!!), RK sir’s PROBLEMS and even phase tests with everyone being screwed up excluding few creatures. I miss the hours of break during AITS and ice cream of Bholu bhaai. Truth and dare seemed interesting as there was not much to hide. Crush directly meant from heart and not due to the bank balance or ability to lie. Smile was meant from the heart and laughter from soul. Life was good. There was no need to check out the history before making friends and trusting them. There were people to help you stand when on your knees, instead of pushing you down to the ground on your knees. Limited ways of expression and lack of words do not allow me to say it all. I always look forward hoping to get chances to meet these people who are so far off yet so close to the heart. A lot has changed since the school days, me, the people and school as well. A part of my soul still lurks in the corridors of DPS, playing with bottles in ground, running around the field, eating in the boundary wall canteen, and looking through the sky. A lot of time has passed, changing for the good and for the bad. But those times rest in my memory as the best days of my life…

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