Guy:So option 1 is, you want me to be sleazy by making a move and by telling her awful that guy is?[10.14]
Friend: yes. If eveything goes right she will date you and dump him.[10.14]
Guy: Do you think that will work?[10.15]
Friend:NO. She might feel guilty and ends thing with you because you are�.[10.16]
Friend: Option 2 is be the rebound guy and wait for eternity till they break up[10.18]
Guy:Will that work?[10.19]
Friend: Probably but waiting might have some consequnces like listening to her pining about the guy, getting ditched by other girls because you are not going to do anything even if a girl likes you[I know you,you will be focused onto her,solely][10.21]
Guy:So, then I will be a LOSER. [10.22]
Friend:Yes, that. Or you could be the cunning one by trying to break them up and win her.But you wont do that I know. Because, well, you are a pussy.[10.23]
Guy: Wait�.To sum it up. Your suggestions to deal with the situation is be SLEAZY or be a LOSER or be CONNIVING.[10.24]
Those are horrible advice.[10.24]
Friend: Well���. if you put it like that, those are horrible choices.But, I have option 4 too. Tell her, accept her answer and move on like a man.[10.25]
Guy:Tell her???!! Really??[10.26]
Since when sharing became a thing? I always thought being a man means hiding your feelings like Bruce Willis. You will never see Bruce Willis sharing his romantic thoughts.[10.28]
Friend:Whatever man�You have to move on.[10.29]
He read this whatsapp chat for the 5th time and asked himself �Why did this happen to me?� A year ago he was perfectly fine and happy. Then, he met her, befriended her and now these unprecedented feelings are making his mind go haywire. Now, coming to the story of why our beloved hero was feeling this way.
He, as most of the middle class bengali would say was returning from �Bangalore�(because bengalis are too stubborn, it would take an eternity to convince them and another eternity to make them say that its Bengaluru, not Bangalore) for the most merry festival of the Bengalis, DURGA PUJO. He was happy because he would be meeting his family, his friends and last of all that special person, whom he considered his very close friend. Throughout the journey, they were constantly chatting like they were a couple but here is the catch, she was already in a relationship (albeit that is doomed relationship, everyone knew that, even that girl but she was too scared to do anything because she is too scared of change and blah blah blah�the usual movie stuffs but that is story of another time). During the flight, he slept, dreamed about her,constantly looked at those floating clouds which for no particular reason reminded him of her(Yeah, you read it right this idiot still thinks that this girl is only his friend). She was the first person who welcomed him to Kolkata even before his parents.
As soon as he landed, they continued to talk, she even asked her to visit his friends at their old office and then go home. To which he replied �So you want to meet me so badly that you are indirectly asking me to come and visit you?� She used to do that very oftenly like make a statement in a casual way but she always meant something else. One time, she changed her facebook dp and slipped this line in the middle of their conversation �You know my new fb dp?!! XYZ dint like it and said he would not like it.� Our beloved hero always found this cute because he always considered her intelligent but at the same time she was na�ve as a baby. He replied to that fb dp line by reacting �So are you letting me know that you have changed your display picture and for that, you want my opinion?� She replied �Yes, ;)�
The prodigal son was enjoying the uber ride to home and listening to Anjan Dutta songs that the radio was playing, when his phone buzzed. He neglected that and when he receached home he read the text from the girl �You coming to visit?� They continued their chat over all those things that would be seem meaningless to normal individuals. Our charming hero got thunderous welcome from his mother who as soon as he entered said �Koto roga hoe gchis?� and his mama and mami who defended the prodigal son by saying �tui to stylish hoe firli re..�Amidst of all this cacophony, father of our beloved hero was watching everything with a ciggerate in his hand and grin on his face. He moved towards his son and like every other bengali father, said �Oke kichu khete dao�
The day flew away with our beloved hero telling his family about adventures of bangalore and how he single handedly transformed himself from a guy-could-barely-move-on-his-own to cook/laundry-guy/man servant/IT employee. The prodigal son was back and it was sheer happiness at the household. He went out everyday to meet his friends from school,college,office and whenever he was home, he was either texting or sleeping. Mother India once asked him �Tor Garlfriend hoeche naki? Hole bol �. However grown up you become but whenever your parent asks you this question the only thing that you could say is �NO� with a grin and rosy cheek like a 16 year old girl who just saw his crush. That conversation went for a little while with banters rocekting from both ends and one zinger line after another. Our beloved hero was accussed of not giving enough time to his family and giving preference to his friends and smart phone.
Then the day when he was going to meet his �very good� friend. He was awake at 6 and walked nervously at the terrace for an hour, for God knows why. He barely ate and shaved like a man on a mission. He took out his best shirt and wore it and with a grin on his face, try to do his best Robert De Niro impression from the movie Taxi Driver.
20 minutes later,
He was changing his 5th shirt and contemplating on which shirt to wear. Finally, he locked onto something. The whole group decided to meet at a mall. From there, they would start there journey. The clock was 12.47 when that fated moment came for which our beloved was waiting for months, the moment he will fix his eyes on her and say those lines of his that he was practicing throughout the night.But instead he said, �Woow�So much make up!!?? You look hideous.� To which she replied �So what? I like it that�s why I wore this.�
The whole group met and left finally at around 1.20 pm. They went to bar and drank. Our beloved hero could not drink much because for breakfast he had vodka and puffed rice. They drank, joked and clicked some horribly drunk pictures and laughed at their old jokes. They made fun of our heroines� apocalyptic almost-doomed love life and how there days as a couple are numbered.So finally, they left the bar and called it a night.
Our hero was not happy, he wanted to spend some more time with his friends but they did not. He remained silent but ultimately vented his anger on our heroine. They verbally text-fought for an hour and then realising that they will be meeting next week decided to let bygones be bygones and continued with their lives[basically, pandal hopping and gorging chilli chicken and fried rice-bengali food for pujo tourists].
Then that fated day came, when he received the text �Can we keep it short and early on Saturday? Actually I have plans.�
He instantly realised that night was there last goodbye but still he replied �How early and how short?�
�Around 1 and like 2hr�
�Actually I will be out of town and will be reaching by 3pm. So I think we should cancel it ?�
Then came some irrelevant messages which were all moot. Our beloved hero knew all about priorities. He understood the priority he gave her was not the same she gave him. They chatted that night but it was all one sided. Our heroine tried cheering our fallen hero but he replied in one word. Even if he tried hiding his sadness he knew his one sentence reply is enough to let our heroine know that our beloved hero is trying to not be negative. He thought that night, very hardly about his life, why was he feeling that way?
He thought of letting our heroine know his feelings and the sacrifices that he was willing to make just for that meeting but in the end he stopped. So now our heroine will never know that he was ready to scrap his almost 15 year old bengali family tradition of eating vegetarian food on Saturday just for that meeting. She will never know that he was ready to cut short his trip to his native place where people will be meeting him after many years for that meeting. But in the end after getting nothing he decided to get some help and texted his friend.
Guy: Dude, I need some help� You know the movie What If� I think I have become Daniel Radcliffe from the movie. [10.00]
Friend:Do tell me[10.01]
Guy:Ok, let me tell you from the beginning.[10.1]