Obsessed

She looked at him and found him boring. He was just another random guy in her class. In fact, the guy had the audacity to check out her friend. Tina later learns that this guy has a tendency to subtly admire girls. He does have a girl friend (which Tina did not know at the time), but then guys will be guys. This particular guy, doesn't speak with her for the first few days. Things get worse when she is made the representative of the class. She is now forced to speak to everyone. But now she knows his name. The guy's name is Krish. A very cute name, she thinks. Krish loves teasing her. To be truthful, he teases everyone, but he teases Tina more. At first, Tina is frustrated with this imp. He always riles her and makes life difficult for her. He makes her scream at him, discipline him and hit him (with articles like bag).
He always borrowes her notes for examinations. And the shocking thing is she always gives it to him. She can never say"no" to him. She asks about his personal life and when she finds out that he is in a relationship something inside her breaks. She realizes then what this guy has done.
She realizes that she thinks about him all the time. She talks to him in class and on WhatsApp. She listens to his suggestions first. She even waits for his reply and won't be happy until she gets one. All of her dreams and thoughts are filled with this guy and she kind of likes the way he teases her. It makes her feel as though she is important to him.
But she is never able to tell him all this. She bottles it inside her heart. Krish shows her his girl Friend's photo and it tears her heart away. She is beautiful. And Krish loves her. She cries that night because she knows she will never have him.
Things begin to spiral now. She slowly moves away from her family and friends because all her time is spent in day dreams which would never be fulfilled. She cannot focus on her studies because all her concentration is on Krish. Thinking about him causes her pain and yet she does it anyway. She doesn't know what to call this feeling. She can't look at other guys because she always finds similarities between the guy she is looking and Krish.
She isn't alone. Her trustworthy friend gives a name for this feeling. She says she has experienced it herself. Tina desperately asks for ways to be out of this. But there is only so much a friend could do. Tina decides that this can be rectified if she were somehow able to find differences between Krish and herself. She is a nerd. The guy doesn't like studying. Or reading, for that matter. She is respectful and at least has some sort of morality. He lacks it. So she found many differences and was somehow able to dislike him. She had many good friends who helped her through it.
Tina was obsessed with Krish. This was not in love or infatuation. This was a disease which Tina was glad to be rid of. It was a black lesion and an abomination. In love at least, there are instances of happiness. In obsession, there is only an empty feeling that fills up not only your heart but your mind too. Tina would much rather prefer to fall in love or be infatuated. She hoped that she wouldn't fall in this trap again.