chapter 1
reality
I am dying inside. the fabric of space and time is falling apart. Weep as we fall apart. not as two people, but just myself. it is my mind that has me in its grasp. its hard to control. what is this that controls me? is it depression? or something more? it could be a concious. an inner instinct to bring order to my self being. maybe it is what keeps reality from falling into the void. it is no doubt a representation of who i am. why do i do the things i do? i cannot answer this question in most situations. for some things it is easy and the others are hard.
reality is something of existence. to be is to be and to think is to think. to feel is to feel and to exist is to exist. sometimes i wonder, what really does exist. this is not really an accomplishment to my being, but an accomplishment to what is. for what is that that has no being. it is hard to say. i rely on a greater being to justify why things happen. to happen is not really about what is important to everyone else. it is just what i find to be important to me.
this reality is hard to fathom. why do people do the things they do? maybe its because that is their nature. most of the time i sit and ponder why people do the things they do. then i realize it is a waste of time. but sometimes its not because when you can change the bad. it sometimes can become good. everything has an equal and opposite reaction. but i my main reaction is that people will do what they want and not care about the opinion of others.
i believe in god. not as some guy with a beard who watches over us. i believe god is the father of reality. not a father as a man is a parent of a child, but as a matter of control over those who exist and has not yet come to exist. the breath of life is hard to understand when it is just material and superficial. i find this easy to believe while others may find it hard to believe.
people seem not to care about anyone except themselves. this is not true of everyone. this could be an expample of a classic stereotype, but there is some truth to every stereotype. otherwise it wouldnt have came into existance. there is a difference between assumeing and knowing. assumeing is based on ignorance while knowing is based on seen-before facts. how can it be fact if its not always true. it could be like the saying that one rotten apple spoils the bunch. its that one person who ruined it for everyone.
what if each star in the galaxies that exist is a human spirit? that could be why they call the sky the heavens. when you die you become a star and take your place in the heavens. what about shooting stars? maybe they are souls who are chooseing to return to earth to once again live through life. the human spirit in this star form would be different than just an existance of matter. they would live in their own private universes, but still be connected to this plane.
the world has seen no other way to explain things that are hard to explain. people use science as an answer to everything that happens. that doesnt mean science's answers are wrong. it could just be the way of explaining the things which we do not understand. i dont believe people should choose only one thing when it comes to science and god. maybe science explains why god happens and they are god's methods. everyone says theres either god or the big bang and i say why not believe both. maybe the big bang is how god created everything. he naturally let everything fall into place. knowing that it would happen.
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chapter 2
the wicked king
there once lived a king. he was as wicked as every level of hell. he worshiped everything that was evil. he had a servant. the servant smiled all the time he was awake. it made the king angry. he sought to bring misery into the life of the servant.
no matter how hard the king tried. he could not upset the servant. one day the wicked king decided to demand why the servant always smiled.
the servant told the king that everyone he had ever cared about died around him. this puzzled the king. the king asked why the servant still smiled after living a life of turmoil and death. the servant told the king that the reason he always smiled, was because he was grateful to still have his life. it was for the fact that no matter what happened to him. he could still find beauty in everything with or without beauty.
the king being as wicked as he was, did not understand such words. now the wicked king was determined to make the servants life miserable.
he plotted day and night wondering what he could do to make the servant miserable. he tried everything and still the servant smiled.
the wicked king was so angry he sentenced the servant to death. the iing could not stand to see someone so happy. he figured that the servant would curse him. he longed to see such hatred. especially from someone whom was so happy for no apparent reason.
the servant was to be hanged.
the next day all the kings men stood around waiting to witness the hanging of the servant. the king asked the servant if he had any last words. the servant said nothing and simply smiled. the king then called himn to be hanged. the servant was then hung.
as the king raided the servants room. he came acrossb a piece of parchment. the parchment read...
"i lived for love. i shall die for love."
thats when it finally hit the king. this whole time it wasnt about happiness. it was about love. the king finally understood why the servant had smiled. he was in love with a young woman he had met when he was young. the king then remembered that he too was in love at one time. he remembered how she had died. right before his very eyes. it was the reason why he hated. he wanted to make people as miserable as he was that day.
the wicked king realized that even though the servant loved and lost. in reality he never lost anything. he kept her with him. the king say that she had left him a note with two pieces of cloth. the note read.
"keep these and i'll always be with you."
the wicked king then cried. his heart changed dramatically and he was no longer wicked. he took the pieces of cloth so that he too could have something to remember a woman who he once loved then lost.
the king died seven years later. he was finally at peace.
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chapter 3
So One Day...
so one day i was just walkin. just walkin. and a frog came up to me. said ribbit and flipped me off. then the frog hopped off. i learned my lesson that day.
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chapter 4
bitches
what is wrong with bitches. bitches is wrong. wrong is bitches, do you know what i mean? probably not.
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chapter 5
eating yogurt
im just eating yogurt. now im just eating two yogurts. why is it a mystery. im just eating yogurt. vanilla yogurt to be exact. love is a crazy thing. at this point im right behind you. im about to kill you. i wanna watch you bleed. for all these things i cant understand. why did i do this. why did i do this? i scream out loud. but nothing comes out. i am death!
eggs and oreos got together and witnessed a massacre. little timmy was so scared. i murdered him. i told him not to scream because i was going to kill him. what kind of bullshit is that? fuckin piece of shit.
i feel space and reality, it isnt real. i want to put you out of your misery.
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dont be a bitch, why you gotta be a bitch? i cant be sickened with this mission to populate the city. thats pretty shitty to be straight with it, like i, hit it and spit it to rid it of its existance. substanance is what i need like a sustence i bleed. cant you see im fucked up mentaly? damn thats lyrical like green eggs and ham. because i go ham. like bam bam, thank you mam. what the fuck you mean australia? you tattily tell the, bitch to go home. dont give a fuck what you say. i hope you feel alone. omg in this pretty city can you believe we'd be. living with each other all up under the covers. did you really see things my way? today i pray that you wont go away. but its all the same. its all the same. at the same damn time. i speak the same damn rhyme. im brakein in the lane to change my game thats what im thinkin. dont wanna make me be blinkin. what the fuck am i drinkin? just some drank. thank you better spank you and rank to top tier. as i grab my fucking beer. come here to smear lipstick on the mirror. can i make it any clearer. im fucked up beyond all recoginition. so take a second to listen that im pissin all over your dreams. radbrad loves it when the ladies scream. my name i came to bring that earthquake. its rather a fact i make. money from the government and spend half on my rent.
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in a world that really doesnt make sense. what sense is there to be made?
