I feel it's time to stop running now. I cannot keep running away forever.
I loved you, that was PAST for you. I love you, that means nothing to you. I will keep loving you, you are not interested in knowing.
You escaped from our fantasy love story, and left me to go crazy. I laugh at myself that how stupid I am. And, sometimes I cry like a child whose all hopes are taken away. Sometimes, I decide to win you back and other times I feel helpless. I get angry but I cannot express it to you. I have a lot to tell but I cannot share it with you. For, you have created a rock stoned wall between us. You want to communicate with me through that wall, where I cannot hear you and you cannot see me. And with every passing day, you are embellishing that wall and making it stronger to resist any sign of my love and care.
After ten months of continuous suffering and running away from our adorable memories, I still find myself a helpless lover. I feel pity for myeslf. I still feel how cruelly you deprived me off of your love and care. I still cannot understand how can you change within a day?
May be because I have always been surrounded by problems. May be you got sick of listening to my rubbish stories of painful events in my life. I am sorry to make you bore. I tried my level best to make you smile and laugh. I tried my best to give you a shoulder. I tried to be there for you most of the times.
You redefined your priorities, tore away the chapter of ME from your story and dumped it in the darkness of ignorance. Why did you promise to stay with me? Why? I just want the reasons why you treated me that badly? I have no complaints against you, just please give me the reason why did you love me for 4 years and forget it all within a day? I won't come after you and I will never disturb you, but please give me the reason before leaving me alone with those memories where I could see the love in your eyes, and care in your actions.
I am sick of running away. I just want to cry and cry as hard as I can, that after when I stop crying I feel no feeling. I want to empty myself out of feelings of any kind.
Thank you for loving me more than anyone. May you find love from where you desire, unlike me; because I would hate myself for seeing you in pain.
I don't know what I'll become with time. Only love could heal me, but I will try not to be harsh.